Slow Hand

There was a horrible story this weakened about a golfer getting stabbed in Texas, as a result the guy may lose his leg.

Now I really don’t know enough to comment about this particular case but I can on the cause, slow play.

As society many of us do not have the leisure time we used to have or want. Due to the financial climate many of us have had to take second jobs trying to balance this with family time leaves leisure time at a premium.

Now there are many people out there with well paid jobs, no debt who may have all the time in the world. They may look upon a round of golf as a leisurely days activity, if you can then fine.

But, for the lack of better words, it’s the sheer arrogance of slow players that cause problems. Its their time, on their course and they are totally unaware of anyone else outside their bubble. They could be 3 or 4 holes behind the group in front with the group behind them joining them on every tee, it does not bother them 1 iota!

Why cant people just let a quicker group play through?? Seriously why??

So what is the main reasons for slow play ? The standard of player usually has no bearing on it to be honest. I have seen scratch players with the speed of molasses and 18 handicappers who could be fitted with running spikes!

There is a problem, particularly with men of their ego! They are playing off the back tee’s regardless.

I remember once while on holiday in Florida getting paired with 2 guys. After the usual pleasantries where exchanged I asked which tee’s they wanted to play, in unison the reply came “the blacks”!  My first thought was “shit! These must be players”. The 1st was a tricky par 5 with the road leading to the club on the right and water down the left. As I had played the course before I got the honour, I thought sod it I will play for a 6 and hit a 3 wood just for safety. Not my best, but not my worst, on the fairway so breathe out with relief.    

Player 1: 1st tee shot duck hooked in the water, be honest we have all done it, 2nd tee shot duck hook in the water! To be fair been there got the tee shirt, 3rd 20 yards short of the ladies tee! Ok pattern developing, 4th tee shot about 150 yards, he then went to tee up a 5th! I said “hang on that in play” “Yeah but I hit is so much better” he said, 6th tee shot? Duck hooked in water! “I better play the 2nd one” he said!! The 2nd ?????

Player 2: 1st tee shot sliced way over the road onto the 18th! 2nd tee shot was like tin cup as it bounced down the road, 3rd was about 20 yards past ladies tee. By this time the next group was waiting at the tee! “Better play it” he said, no shit Sherlock!

The result of the 1st was I had a 1 put par, I think, only think, they lost 9 balls between them and carded “oh I think it was a double for me” and “I had a bogey using a mulligan” a mulligan!!!! Was at least 8 bloomin mulligan’s!

Hole 2, 220 yard par 3, rescue wood just short of the green for me “Oh you never caught that one” one of them said! Wish I had seen my own face! Player 2 then turns to player 3 and says “What you think a 5 or a 6 for me”  I spat a mouthful of Pepsi down the front of my shirt at that stage, “5 not be too much?” his mate said!

Well this time it was only 5 tee shots between them!

The group behind was where now doing tea pot impressions on mass!

On the 3rd tee I suggested we may enjoy ourselves more from a forward tee, “we paid our money, we always play from the back tee’s” ok well why don’t we wave the group behind through? “ No!! They are a 4, we are only a 3!”

By this time the group behind where at the tee beside us and I could see the next group on the par 3 green!

Player 2 walked up to tee off, I though “eh? I had a bogie” “I had a par with my mully” he said! At this moment I shock hands and headed back to the clubhouse, apologising to the group behind as I left.

When I got back to the pro shop I made my “views” known, they told me, its ok it’s a quiet day! They gave me a rain check, that rain check still sits in my bag, 3 years on!